The Captain Samuel Vimes ‘Boots’ theory of socioeconomic unfairness

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Image © Fairysteps

“The reason that the rich were so rich, Vimes reasoned, was because they managed to spend less money.

Take boots, for example. He earned thirty-eight dollars a month plus allowances. A really good pair of leather boots cost fifty dollars. But an affordable pair of boots, which were sort of OK for a season or two and then leaked like hell when the cardboard gave out, cost about ten dollars. Those were the kind of boots Vimes always bought, and wore until the soles were so thin that he could tell where he was in Ankh-Morpork on a foggy night by the feel of the cobbles.

But the thing was that good boots lasted for years and years. A man who could afford fifty dollars had a pair of boots that’d still be keeping his feet dry in ten years’ time, while the poor man who could only afford cheap boots would have spent a hundred dollars on boots in the same time and would still have wet feet.

This was the Captain Samuel Vimes ‘Boots’ theory of socioeconomic unfairness.”

Terry Pratchett, Men At Arms

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Image © Conker Shoes

I used to be something of a shoe addict. As a child I had to wear Very Sensible shoes, but the moment I was freed from this tyranny I got myself a job in a shoe shop, and spent all my hard-earned cash (did I tell you about the time a toddler kicked me in the eye?) on buying ALL THE SHOES. This continued into my twenties, when I eventually stopped working in a shoe shop (and being kicked by toddlers, mostly), but carried on buying ALL THE SHOES. By the time I was in my thirties, I lived in a house with a dedicated Shoe Cupboard. I don’t think I ever counted them, but at the height of my shoe obsession I probably had something in the region of fifty pairs. A couple of them were very expensive. Most of them were very cheap, badly made, bought in sales, didn’t really fit properly, and certainly weren’t comfortable. Comfortable shoes were for losers! It was all about having the perfect pair to go with the perfect outfit.

After my first hip operation, I bought a pair of hiking trainers, and a pair of orthotics to go inside them. They were a revelation. I could walk! My back didn’t hurt! But wow, they were ugly. I did get rid of the majority of my ridiculously high-heeled shoes, but all I did was replace one addiction with another. I took to buying second-hand Dr Martens on Ebay, thinking that at least they were flat, and (mostly) comfortable. Soon I had a pair to match every outfit! And then the hip surgery came around again, on the other leg. My physiotherapist told me that Dr Martens, even with orthotics inside them, were the worst possible shoes I could wear. (But surely they were originally designed to be orthopaedic? What the heck?!) They were too stiff, offered insufficient support, and he convinced me to sell the lot. Heartbreaking.

Fairysteps Queenie

Since then, having reached the conclusions that 1) I really like being able to walk, and 2) I don’t really fancy having any more hip surgery until they eventually have to be replaced, I made the decision to buy Only Sensible Shoes. An initial online search turned up mostly horrible ugly orthopaedic-looking things, which was a bit depressing. Thankfully I eventually stumbled upon the wonders that are Fairysteps and Conker Shoes!

Conker Boots

I now have a grand total of fifteen pairs of shoes. A small collection for me, but by my husband’s standards, this is triple the number of shoes a person needs. (He has two pairs of army boots, two pairs of Converse, and a pair of casual Merrells that he never wears.) I’ve been gradually building up my collection until I have enough shoes and boots that will work with with most of my clothes, and the only gap remaining is a pair of summer sandals. I’m saving up, and I’m going to buy a gold and silver pair from Conker, if the weather’s ever warm again.

Once my collection’s complete, I effectively won’t need to buy shoes! Ever again!

Actually, I try not to think about that too much, because it makes me shiver a little bit. But the whole point of Conkers is that they can be completely re-soled once they wear out, and then they’ll be lovely and fresh and new again. They can also fix mistakes! My black and silver brogues were my first pair, and I ordered them one width fitting too tight, and with soles that I don’t find especially comfortable. But, when the time comes to have them repaired, I can have the uppers stretched, and the soles replaced with ones I like – without having to buy a whole new pair of shoes!

Fairysteps Moonshine
(Yes, I wear these to work. People take the mickey every damn time, but I wear them anyway.)

I’m not sure what to do about re-soling the Fairysteps collection – I don’t have a Proper Cobbler in my town any more, and I’m not completely convinced I can trust them to any old glue-a-rubber-heel-on shoe repairer on the high street. That’s a bridge I’m going to need to cross fairly soon, as the ones I wear most often are starting to get a little bit slippery as the treads wear away.

Anyway. What was I waffling on about?

Oh yes, I know.

At the end of the day, all of these shoes are really rather expensive.

Like Captain Vimes, I can’t afford them. The boots at the top were bought for me as a joint Christmas gift by my husband, parents and sister, and I chipped in a bit towards them too. But, I think they’re worth the money.

Each pair of these shoes and boots was made individually, by hand, by a single person. (Or a small team, in Conker’s case.) No factory, no thousands of identical pairs being pumped out only to end up in landfill when fashions change, so the impact on the planet in terms of both production and waste is much, much lower. And because they can be repaired, only the worn-out sole needs to be disposed of rather than the entire shoe, meaning less waste again.

The black & silver brogues were a colour combination that I chose, and Conker put together for me. I have a pair of Fairysteps boots that are turquoise with little brown birds on them, which are absolutely unique. Conker don’t make their derby boots with a brogue toecap – but when I emailed to ask them whether it was possible, they said yes. They also read my blog, spotted that my black & silver shoes were too tight, and recommended a wider fit when I bought the boots – a year later. How’s that for customer service?!

So yes, it can be very hard to reconcile spending a lot of money on a pair of shoes. Especially when you don’t have a great deal of money to spend in the first place. (Which, as someone who works part time, I definitely don’t!) But when you look at how long these boots are going to last, the kind of customer service that comes with them, and the greatly reduced impact on the planet thanks to opting out of mass production, the decision (to me, at least) seems a great deal easier.

Shiny New Conkers!

Conker Boots

I don’t think I told you, back in January, about my glorious pink Conker boots? Here they are, having been worn for the past six months, and they really are the most comfortable pair of boots I’ve ever owned!

I ordered them in November, having seen a photo of a pair of magenta ripley (a very soft leather) boots on Conker’s Facebook page. Being in love with my Conker brogue shoes, I asked whether I could have brogue toecaps added to a pair of boots. The answer turned out to be yes… but not in the ripley leather, as it’s too thick. So the lovely team at Conker sent me three little circles of pink leather in the post, so I could choose which one I wanted for the toe cap. I went for a slightly waxy leather, but one that I’d be able to polish when they inevitably got a bit scuffed. Although I have to say that, six months in, they’re looking pretty good!

I knew I wanted a plain black pair pretty much the same as the pink ones, it was just a question of saving up enough pennies to pay for them. Just as I was beginning to wonder about the wisdom of spending such a lot of money on a pair of plain black boots, and half contemplating a return to Doc Martens, I spotted a gorgeous pair of black shoes with white stitching (again on Conker’s Facebook page) which gave me an idea.

Conker Boots

Dear lovely people at Conker, please don’t cry when you see this picture!

You see, I didn’t really want white stitching at all. I wanted pink. So the moment my boots arrived, even before I’d tried them on, I set about colouring in the white stitching with a pink Sharpie. As you do.

Conker Boots

I know that the stitching will eventually get dirty, and as I polish the boots it will eventually turn black. But for now, while they’re new, I have the simple pleasure of knowing that nobody else has a pair of boots exactly like these.

Perfect!

I’m also really pleased that all of my shoes (with the exception of trainers and waterproofs) are now made by hand, in the UK. So much better than all those mass-produced uncomfortable shoes I used to collect!

Shiny Shoes!

Conker Shoes

Yay, my shiny new Conker shoes have arrived!

They were delivered on Friday, while I was out at work. Paul very kindly went to pick them up from the sorting office for me while I was out at work on Saturday. He was somewhat startled to find that the postman knew me, and was not at all surprised to discover that the parcel contained shoes! He used to drive the delivery van for our area, so he got to know me very well in the days when I was collecting unusual Dr Martens from Ebay. Sometimes he used to wait on the doorstep while I opened my parcels, so he could see my unusual choice of shoes. I think he’d have been impressed by these!

I wore the shoes to work on Sunday, and they’re lovely! Not quite enough room for orthotics and handknit socks both at once, which tells me I should probably have ordered a 6F rather than a 6E. Conker offer amazing customer service and I could have sent them back to be stretched a little bit, but being the impatient sort I couldn’t resist wearing them straight away.

Conker Shoes

The lovely people at Conker are probably going to cry when they see this picture. I don’t think they’d take them back in this state! Yes, I knew it had been raining, and I should have put on a big pair of boots. But, new shoes!
(I know, I know. And yes, I have cleaned them now that the mud’s dry.)


Photo © Sarah Wainwright

I went for a walk with Sarah (Skycarrots), and we sketched and made rubbings and nibbled leaves and took pictures. Sarah took a picture of me, taking a picture of my shoes. She also took some lovely ones of a meadow full of cowslips, glowing as the light faded. We’re planning on making these walks a regular occurrence, so hopefully we’ll have full sketchbooks and photo albums to show you soon. It was lovely to go out with a friend, and find a bit of creative inspiration in our local area.

Selling my Sole(s)…

The Great Spring Cleaning of 2012 has begun.

Actually, it began a few weeks ago when I wore one my my beloved pairs of Jeffery~West shoes and they gave me a blister. Again. At that point I finally had to concede that I’m not a size 40, no matter how thick my socks are, and it was time to let go. I popped all four pairs on Ebay, and with the resulting funds I treated myself to a new pair of boots. Not quite in the same sort of style… but I’ve ordered a pair of Fairysteps‘ finest Moonshine boots. Mine will be in gold (GOLD!!) with round toes and silver stars. I’m trying not to be impatient, but I can’t wait for them to arrive!

Flushed with success, I thought it was about time I cleared out all of my other shoes that I bought because they look amazing, but which turned out to be impractical or ill-fitting. There are a few pairs still on Ebay, ending this afternoon. Depending on how much money I raise from those, I plan to buy one pair of shoes to replace the lot. My criteria are:

  • Hand made, or at least made in England,
  • Actually comfortable,
  • Gorgeous,
  • Smart, and black.

Current contenders are Fairysteps Clara or Quince, Conker star sandals, Green Shoes Willow, or the slightly more heavy-duty Dr Martens for Life.

You may have noticed that I’m also selling my beloved concertina, and my Mulberry handbag. I’m on a mission to no longer keep things that I don’t use, however lovely they may be as objects in their own right. An instrument that’s never played and a handbag that’s never carried are fundamentally useless, so it seemed like their time to be re-homed with someone who’ll appreciate them.

[edit]
Apparently I’m not selling my “Mulberry” handbag – Ebay have taken down the listing because it’s been reported as a fake! I was extremely indignant at first, having bought it from what I thought was a reputable place, but a little online research tells me they’re right. How embarrassing! Because I’d never owned a Mulberry bag before, I didn’t notice the subtle differences in the details that tell you it’s not a real one. All the details which I, in the spirit of full disclosure, have just photographed and put on Ebay! A classic example of caveat emptor, I suppose. *sigh*

Still, now I can’t sell it, I feel a bit less bad about making some alterations that will allow me to actually use it. Like taking off the straps and repositioning them so that they actually fit over my shoulder, for a start. Onwards and upwards…

Conker Shoes

While we were in Totnes, I went to do a little window-shopping. For handmade shoes.

We didn’t find Green Shoes (because it turns out that their workshop’s not actually in Totnes but just outside), but we did find Conker. I tried on a couple of different styles to find out what size I need in Conker shoes (6E), but I couldn’t afford to buy anything. But now I know what size I need I can safely order shoes from the internet, the next time I have enough money in my Shoe Fund.

I also learned that 6E and 6F are the same width but the F has more instep space, which is a very useful thing to know when you have a high instep and wear orthotics.

The round toes and the crepe soles made these little boots (I tried on a lovely nut-brown pair) incredibly light and comfortable. I’ve been coveting these shoes via the internet for years, but now I’ve actually had them on my feet I want a pair (okay, several pairs) more than ever!